topic: drunk driving
thesis: Drunk driving has been a problem for years. If the laws were to be changed to be more strict, the number of deaths due to drunk driving and drunk drivers on the road would decrease.
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I think you're on to a good topic with a lot of supporting details behind it; however, you should try to make your thesis more "in depth" by adding some statistics or other forms of evidence that add credibility to your argument. You should also try and go into some details of which laws should be changed.
ReplyDeleteThat is a really great topic! I'm really interested to see everything you research; however, I think you need to be more specific in exactly what you're planning on researching. Do you think that will be hard to write 3000 words on? I know there is a lot of evidence out there. What all do you plan on discussing?
ReplyDeleteI really like your topic. I think you will be able to find a lot of statistics and I think that will be very beneficial in your paper.
ReplyDeleteI think your topic is very interesting but I feel like it is too general. The conclusion you draw is also very obvious. I feel like you should focus on a more specific topic and make a more outlandish conclusion.
ReplyDeleteI really like your topic of drunk driving and it seems like your paper would be really interesting but your thesis seems too broad. You have no details to support your ideas or any direction to go with the paper. It seems too general.
ReplyDeleteGreat topic, but I think that you should narrow down your ideas so that your paper won't be too broad. What part of drunk driving do you think you could write 3000 words on?
ReplyDeleteThis is a really good topic however your thesis should include some more information on what your paper is going to talk about. Saying the laws should be changed is a bit vague.
ReplyDeleteThis topic is legit. Definitely should be able to find some great statistics and facts to support your ideas. Try to be a bit more specific in your thesis.
ReplyDeleteGood topic but your thesis needs to be more succinct. Try something like this.
ReplyDeleteDrunk driving is and has been serious a problem; however, if (say what kind of laws) were to be imposed the result would lead to fewer drunk drivers and drunk driving deaths.
Really great and relevant topic to us now! Definitely try to narrow your thesis down though to be more specific.
ReplyDeleteGreat comments. I agree. M. Drake has given you a very good pattern to model, Lauren.
ReplyDeleteStart over. Rethink your topic and thesis and post it again with your proposal.
-Candace